I no longer look like the girl posing with the cute baby girl in my profile pic.
This will happen to you if you lose a child. Stress, fear, grief. All of it.
I clearly remember my cheeks drying out from all the salt tears that covered them most waking hours in the year after Eva died.
Those tears aged me. My aching heart aged me. I am old.
At first I hated every day that passed between Eva's death and the day I was in. Every day brought me further from my precious girl.
Now, I am happy to say good bye to another day. I am one day closer to seeing my girl again. One day closer to my death. One day closer to Eva.
And yet, it's just so hard to fathom too...the day I look forward to, the day I die will also be the day I say good bye, for a time, to the children I cherish here on earth. Another awful, unlivable juxtaposition. Goodbye and Hello.