Thursday, May 31, 2012


I took two of my boys to soccer today. Eva watched them play soccer last year. She watched them a couple of times in the spring...and she watched them once in August. Once in August. Then she died. There was a little girl we know on the field today. She had pink soccer socks on. Her hair was in braids. She was a little smaller than the other kids on the field with her. I don't know why it hurt to look at her. Hurt to see yet another thing my Eva won't do. Another loss. No first steps, No first words, No soccer. Last time I sat on the side of that soccer field, Eva was on my lap. However, lest I forget, Eva can FLY.


  1. I wish so badly that Eva was with you. Learning to walk and babbling toddler speak that only you would understand. I wish that she could have soccer socks and even a pink soccer ball and maybe dream of being Mia Hamm, Brandy Chastain or Hope Solo. I hope that there is such amazing spirit baby/toddler stuff that she and Grace are doing. Eva is showing Grace the ropes on how to be a super cool spirit child until the day when we can join them and then they can teach us what we have been missing.

  2. Oh Anella, I just weep for you as I read these two latest posts. She's always missing from our midst, and now that it's so nice out it's a new season that she's missing from. I see her sitting in your lap at soccer, playing in the sand at the playground, and I so terribly wish I was helping get her buckled in when I'm doing the other kids. Today was an especially empty day at the park even though seven kids ran around.

  3. And she is soaring. And we'll soar with her someday. But until then...we will miss our sweet girls. ~Renee