Heaven Days.

Today is Emily's 4th Heaven Day!

Eva's chimes tinkle in the wind outside. They are Eva laughing. Eva laughing in Heaven as she celebrates the day her friend, Emily, got her Heaven Day. I wonder if there is more celebrating in Heaven on your Heaven Day than on your birthday?

Funny that we should go through the years we have alive on earth always celebrating our birthday but also quietly, unknowingly, passing by the silent marker of our coming Heaven Day. As the days pass into weeks into months and into years...today we remember Emily's 4th Heaven Day. I love to think of Emily and Eva together in Heaven. Where Emily's dad and I treeplanted together years ago, who knew we would have the dubious connection here on earth of having daughters in Heaven.  Years ago when we were crazy treeplanters but Joel was way more grounded than I was. He was already living his life for Christ and I was only on the road to Him.

This Thursday coming up is my oldest son, Samuel's, sixth birthday. I remember the days leading up to his birth. I was heavy and anxious and I just wanted this baby out already (he was 10 days late). Whenever the birthday of one of my children rolls around I think back to the time before they were born when I was so anxious to meet them. Now I also look back to all the August 15th's that I have lived through (34 to be exact) and I know that I was spending several of them as a baby and young child, many of them anticipating my September birthday, some of them not looking forward to going back to school, one of them getting ready for a trip to Guatemala, a few of them in other countries, a couple of them treeplanting, one of them as a new mom, holding my 2 month old firstborn son, two of them 7 months pregnant (with Vincent and Eva respectfully). Never in all those August 15th's did I think that one of those days would be the day I held my daughter as she had her dying gasps in my arms. Never did I anticipate that it would be my daughter's Heaven Day. A day of weeping and of celebration.

I often think now as I mark the days on the calendar, which one will be my Heaven Day? Which day am I unknowingly marking as the silent pre-anniversary of my inevitable someday Heaven Day? Of Mike's? Counting down the days to Eva and to Heaven.