Tomorrow is our fourth Eva's Ride.
As the landscape of our grief changes, so, too, do other things and one of these is Eva's Ride. It's not that we love her less. If anything it's that our hearts just love her so much. It's that there is so much love and nowhere to put it.
So we have decided this is our last Eva's Ride.
Eva's Ride has been a big deal for me to organize. I start with thank you cards in March and I go to our usual sponsors and ask for hot dogs, t shirts, a bbq. It's not hard you know but people get tired of it. They get tired of being asked for stuff. And I don't want to be turned down. It would do me in.
And it's emotional. The cards, the hot dogs, the water, the bbq and it's all not that big a deal except that it's all in memory of my daughter. And it just.hurts.so.damn.much.
And I want to end it when people are still coming. End it before I have to beg people to come. End it before it's so in my face that nobody remembers. Or wants to remember.
I guess it's just time.
I do have some other things up my sleeve but they are much smaller scale and I can do it myself as I want to or need to
So stay tuned something is coming for her birthday in October. Small. But kind.
Much love from Eva's Mama.